Springtime Indolence and Fading Motivation

In springtime, perhaps all thoughts are extraneous, with leisure time to spare yet too disinclined to ponder or organize ones thoughts and emotions. Perhaps all these idle musings were eaten away by the wild beasts of spring. Laziness can be excused, though; perhaps it is better not to hold onto fleeting moments if one is amidst the vicissitudes of spring.

After finishing coffee at a coffee shop, eating , cycling back home, I encountered many people leaving work and returning to school in the evening. Moving against the crowd, my mood grew restless and vacillated as I headed back to work on Fridays. This week in early spring, I found myself with no motivation for any work-related activities despite having tasks pending. All I could think about was solitude.

The first few days of spring this week saw me accomplishing nothing, though there were many things to do. Yet, I lacked the enthusiasm to engage in anything worthwhile. My mind wandered from book to book without any real focus. Lightly carried by the breeze, my mood was somewhat (floating). I consumed several pints of cold beer, and myItch was itchy, as if something were beginning to germinate.

Though I lost much time and regretted many things, in those fleeting moments when my mind wandered, depression did not reassert itself. For that, I am grateful.

The day passed quickly during the daytime, but the evening seemed endlessly drawn out under the influence of wind, as if it would never end. Although I did nothing that eveningjust chatted and watched old animationsI can only describe it as such.